


Warriors

by kronette



Series: Circles in the Sand [1]
Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Episode: s03e10 Forever in a Day, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-06
Updated: 2014-03-06
Packaged: 2018-01-14 15:16:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,585
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1271206
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kronette/pseuds/kronette
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>First of four stories centering around "Forever In A Day". Each story is told from a different character's POV. The first is Teal'c, having just stepped inside the tent with Daniel and Amaunet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Warriors

I am a warrior not of their world. I have chosen my life's path, away from the false gods of the Goa'uld. I now serve with the Tau'ri, as a member of SG1. My life before the Tau'ri involved many atrocities. One such atrocity involved the wife of someone I now call friend. It is she, Sha're, that I now face. As Amaunet controls Sha're, Daniel Jackson's life ebbs away under the force of the ribbon device. I am faced with a difficult decision. I can save Daniel Jackson's life, but in order to do so, I must kill Amaunet. I hesitate but a second before making my choice. 

I lower myself to one knee, in honor of Sha're. I apologize to Daniel Jackson, for there is little else I can do. I have corrected the mistake I made with Sha're in the only way I know how. I have freed her from the Goa'uld influence, though now she is dying. I do not regret my actions in saving Daniel Jackson's life. However, I feel sorrow for the loss of Sha're's life. She did nothing to deserve her fate. As the Tau'ri say, she was in the wrong place at the wrong time. 

The sound of gunfire lessens outside the tent, and I sense someone approach. Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter stare at the scenario before them. I inform them that Daniel Jackson will be fine. I do not think that is what they want to hear, but it is sufficient. Major Carter will grieve with Daniel Jackson, that I am sure. O'Neill will grieve as well, but not in the same way. I have learned much about how the Tau'ri grieve. Too much. 

Daniel Jackson is stronger than some of the Tau'ri believe. He separated the actions of Amaunet from those of Sha're. He declared his love for Sha're even while she carried the child of Apophis. His belief was strong that he would find Sha're and free her from the Goa'uld. He declares his love for her even now, as she lies dying. I feel as though I am an intruder on a private moment. 

I am sure that Daniel Jackson does not see me, but then he calls out to me. I did not think him so strong a man that he would not blame me for Sha're's death. Perhaps I have underestimated him. 

He will need medical assistance. He will feel the effects of the ribbon device for some days. I fear his heart will need more attention. His love for Sha're is strong, and his hope of bringing her home never wavered. He is, indeed, a special warrior. He is a warrior of the heart. If he believes in something, he believes with every fiber of his being. His strength comes from his beliefs. Major Carter has much of the same strength, though she is also a formidable warrior, highly skilled with weapons. 

O'Neill, Major Carter and myself step outside to allow Daniel Jackson time by himself. I survey the battlefield. Jaffa and serpent guard bodies litter the sand. The Tau'ri have done well this day. SG teams are making a sweep of the grounds to ensure that all the guards are dead. 

The tent opens and Daniel Jackson appears. I turn around, but do not step closer. Though he has said he does not blame me, I do not wish him more pain. His face is wet with tears and his voice is different, but he stands tall. 

"She's dead," he announces, proving to me that he did not sense either O'Neill or Major Carter's presence. "I need to speak to Kasuf about the fu – arrangements. I have to tell him about his daughter." He looks out over the sea of dead bodies, a puzzled frown forming. "What happened?" 

"We were ambushed. Don't worry, Danny, we won," O'Neill answers, though his voice is softer than normal. 

"Oh." Daniel Jackson does not appear to care. "Did the Abydonians get back home?" 

"We sent them back through the Stargate," O'Neill confirms. 

"Oh," Daniel Jackson says again. He starts walking toward the Stargate. "I need to find Kasuf." 

Major Carter steps in front of him, but he walks around her. "Daniel," she calls after him. "Daniel!" 

He stops and turns. "Yes?"

"Daniel," she repeats in a softer voice. "I really think Janet should check you out first." 

An odd smile forms on his lips. "I've seen Janet enough. I just want to see Kasuf. I need to see good father." 

"All right." O'Neill holds up a hand. "We'll all see him as soon as we're done here."

"I think we've done enough," Daniel Jackson says and his voice catches on the words. 

This is an extremely difficult time for him. He is weak from the Goa'uld attack. I step forward, drawing the rest of SG1's attention. "I will accompany Daniel Jackson to see Kasuf." 

"No, Teal'c," Daniel Jackson looks at me and I can see the confusion in his eyes. I sense tension from O'Neill and Major Carter, though Daniel Jackson does not appear to wish me harm. "I'd like you to stay with...her. Make sure they," he takes a deep breath, "handle the body correctly." 

I bow slightly to cover up my surprise. I did not expect such an honor from Daniel Jackson. His eyes are very intent on me and I meet his gaze unflinching. "I am honored." 

He nods slightly in understanding. He knows what he asks. He is very wise in the cultures of other people. 

A member of SG6 jogs over to O'Neill and salutes. "Sir, we've found three Jaffa still alive. And we've got some pretty damaged people. Permission to contact SGC and request medical assistance." 

O'Neill returns the salute. "Permission granted. Ask General Hammond to get in contact with Kasuf and get back to me. His presence is requested." 

"Yes, sir." 

They salute once more, then we are left alone. 

"Thanks, Jack," Daniel Jackson says, though he is looking toward the Stargate. 

His back is to the tent that contains Sha're and I wonder if there is some significance to this. I raise an eyebrow at O'Neill to get his attention. He shrugs in answer, clearly not understanding Daniel Jackson's actions, either. I look to Major Carter, but she is staring, concerned, at her teammate. 

"Daniel!" she suddenly shouts and rushes forward. 

Daniel Jackson drops to his knees and falls to his side. Both O'Neill and I try to reach him, but Major Carter reaches him first, before his head touches the ground. 

"The ribbon device has weakened him," I announce. "He needs medical attention." 

"I know, Teal'c. Help is on the way," O'Neill assures me. He still radiates concern for Daniel Jackson, however. 

Major Carter is smoothing Daniel Jackson's hair and muttering to him, as one would a small child. She knows the effects of the ribbon device, so my fear for Daniel Jackson lessens. He will be well cared for. 

The Stargate activates and the medical teams come through. A doctor comes straight toward us and kneels by Major Carter and Daniel Jackson. The doctor starts the examination immediately. 

"He was attacked by a ribbon device," I offer. 

Knowledgeable fingers check Daniel Jackson's forehead. "How long was he under attack?"

"I do not know," I answer with regret. "When I arrived inside the tent and saw Amaunet, I fired immediately. The ribbon device was deactivated at that time." 

"We need to get him to the infirmary. Major?" The doctor and Major Carter lift Daniel Jackson to a stretcher and they carry him back to the Stargate. 

"He'll be fine, Teal'c," O'Neill assures me. 

I do not need assuring, however. I know that Daniel Jackson's physical injuries will heal sufficiently. "I must tend to my duties." I return to the tent and stand guard outside until the coroner arrives. 

O'Neill accompanies me and begins to speak. "I can pretty much guess what happened. Daniel charged into the tent with Amaunet, she started melting his brain and you stopped her." 

"That is essentially correct. I raised my staff weapon and fired upon Amaunet. The Goa'uld inside Sha're was killed." I am listening to O'Neill, but I am watchful of the cleanup of the bodies. Several SG members are digging large holes in the sand. Other SG members are lowering the bodies of the Jaffa into the holes. A mass grave. Some part of me rebels at that. It is not our fault that we were taken slaves of the Goa'uld. "Then Sha're herself died." 

O'Neill removes his hat and slaps it against his leg, I assume in frustration. He concludes, "Then we busted in."

I cannot watch the SG teams bury Jaffa anymore. I turn my eyes straight ahead. "That is correct." 

"Damn." O'Neill glances inside, an action I do not understand. 

"She is dead," I confirm, thinking he has some doubts. He knows that Goa'uld are hard to kill. 

"I know, Teal'c." He settles his hat back on his head, a gesture I have learned means impatience or helplessness from him. "It's just...the poor guy's been hoping for years to bring her home. I'm betting this isn't how he pictured it." 

"Sha're will be given a place among the god of her people," I inform him with confidence. I know the Abydonian customs well. "She will not be held accountable for the symbiote's actions." 

"That's fine and good, but it won't keep Daniel warm at night." With that enigmatic statement, Colonel O'Neill goes to join the other SG teams in recovering fallen team members. 

I puzzle over O'Neill's statement for only a moment. If there had been a way to save Daniel Jackson's life and the life of Sha're, I would have done so. I had no recourse but to fire or my friend would have died. In doing so, I have caused him more pain. But he lives. O'Neill has said that I am a man of great honor. I am...conflicted...at my action against Amaunet. If I had to do it over again, I would change nothing. I made a choice; one life over another. I chose the one I could save. But in doing so, I have destroyed Daniel Jackson's hope that Sha're could be saved. O'Neill is right; the hope that Daniel Jackson carried inside him is gone and he no longer holds a place for Sha're at his side. I must do all I can to assist him. 

Two SG personnel approach. I recognize them as part of the medical team. I allow them to pass, then follow them inside. They work efficiently, and I need only make a few comments on how to properly ready the body. They place Sha're on a stretcher and cover her face. I follow them back to the Stargate and down into the morgue. I receive curious stares, but I concentrate on my duty. Once Sha're's body is secured in the morgue, I retire to my quarters. I require Kelno'reem to calm my Goa'uld larvae after the firefight. Day has turned to dusk and it is time for evening meal. I choose to fast in honor of my fallen comrades. 

Some of my candles have burnt low; I will need to request a new supply in the morning. I settle on the floor and turn my concentration inward. I feel the Goa'uld inside me and will it to rest. Soon, we are as one and my body begins to heal the minor injuries I received in battle. I remain in Kelno'reem even after I am healed, as my mind requires the rest. 

A repeating sound penetrates my concentration. Someone is knocking at the door. I call out, "Enter," but do not move.

The door opens, but the visitor does not enter. I turn, and Daniel Jackson has one hand on the door, his body partly inside my room. My full attention rests on him. I was not aware he had been released from the infirmary. "You may come in, Daniel Jackson," I offer, using the same tone of voice Major Carter did earlier. 

"I don't want to disturb you..." He has a look on his face that O'Neill has described as 'lost'. 

I do not wish him to be lost. I try to think of a way to make him feel welcome. "You do not. My injuries have healed." 

He seems surprised at my statement. "I didn't realize...I was so focused on Sha're that I totally blocked out everything else. How is everyone?"

I stop myself from giving a full report. This is not the time. "We received some casualties, but the Jaffa were defeated." 

"That's good." 

Daniel Jackson does not want to have this conversation. Why do the Tau'ri insist upon saying one thing when they want to discuss something else entirely? "Why have you come?" 

"Hm? Oh. Right. Why I'm here." He starts to pace around my small space, heedful of the candles on the floor. He abruptly stops and stares hard at me. "How much longer would I have lived?" 

I was not expecting that question. "Mere seconds. The ribbon device is capable..."

"I know what it's capable of, Teal'c," he interrupts me. He starts pacing again. He is highly agitated. "Was it absolutely necessary to kill her?"

His eyes are shining in the light; he has shed tears recently. He behaved admirably back on P8X-873, holding back most of his emotions for when he was alone. However, none of this will help me explain to my friend. "It was." 

He wrapped his arms around himself, as if he were cold. I have seen it many times, mostly as a protective gesture. "Teal'c, do you know if it's possible to send thoughts - emotions through a ribbon device?" 

Before I can answer, Daniel Jackson is already answering himself. 

"Sam said that ribbon devices were thought controlled, so it _is_ possible for thoughts to be sent from the host to the receiver." He smiles so brightly that I worry for his health. What pleasure could be derived from a ribbon device? "Sha're spoke to me, Teal'c." 

There is such sadness and joy in that statement that I cannot speak. It is not required, for Daniel Jackson continues. 

"She told me where I could find her child; the Harcesis. She said I had to continue my journeys through the Chappa'ai and shetoldmetoforgiveyou." 

The last part of Daniel Jackson's statement is rushed, but I can make out the words. Curious. Did Sha're sense my presence and send her husband a message? Did she know him so well, that she knew he would blame me for her death and tried to forestall any misgivings? 

"She said you did what must be done. By killing her, you set her free." His eyes plead with me. "Tell me that's true, Teal'c. Tell me she's truly free." 

I would not lie to him, even if it wasn't so. I have always been honest with Daniel Jackson, even if is not a pleasant admission. "She is. The Goa'uld no longer controls her. It is no longer part of her. Sha're, your wife, was restored before her death." I pause before continuing. I am not sure if this will help Daniel Jackson or not, but I feel it important to say. "The Tau'ri, as well as other beings across the galaxy, cherish freedom of choice. I do not know if this will provide comfort, but there have been hosts who thanked whoever killed them, for ending their torment." Daniel Jackson loses the fight against his tears, though he is smiling. It is a most curious combination. "You cry, yet you smile. Why is this?" 

He laughs and wipes his eyes. "I'm sad that she's - dead, but I'm happy that she died being Sha're and not Amaunet. Sha're is the woman I love. I got to see her one last time before the end. That was very important to me. I didn't realize how important until it happened." 

He chews on his thumbnail, a sign of distress. I become more alert. 

He meets my eyes again. "I - I'd like to thank you, Teal'c." 

"I have done nothing that warrants thanks."

He is pacing again. "You said that hosts sometimes thank the people who kill them. Since Sha're can no longer speak, I speak for her." He places his hand on my shoulder. "Thank you. You gave me my Sha're back." 

This is not the first time I have been thanked for ending a host's life, but this is the first time thanks were expressed by a friend. I am humbled. "I regret that it had to be done, Daniel Jackson. If I could have saved you both, I would have." 

His gaze drops from mine. "I know you would have." His hand slips from my shoulder and he moves to sit on my bunk. The warrior Daniel Jackson is growing weak. 

"Are you well?" 

"I'm fine," he dismisses my concern, but then he grins shyly. "I sort of sneaked out of the infirmary." 

Doctor Frasier will be most displeased when she discovers him missing. And Daniel Jackson needs to be watched. "You must return at once. The ribbon device..." 

"Put me in a weakened state; I know that, Teal'c." He smiles at me again and I grow more puzzled. The Tau'ri have the strangest 'mood swings', as O'Neill says about Major Carter. "I couldn't rest until I talked to you." 

He had much to say about Sha're to me. I understand his need for conversation. I am experiencing calmness, myself. Perhaps this conversation has helped me as well. "Now that you have done so, will you return to the infirmary?" 

He leans back against the wall, placing his feet upon my bunk. He misses my eyebrow raised in query. "I don't want to. I'm sick of the infirmary. I spent enough time there already." 

I do not understand this line of conversation, unless he is referring to his previous visits to the infirmary. 

My puzzlement must have shown, because he elaborates, "Sha're didn't just give me the information. She...it was like I was living day to day. I saw her body in the morgue. I attended her funeral. I quit the SGC and returned. It felt as though two weeks had passed. All in the space of..." 

He looks helplessly at me and I can only guess that he requests a timeframe. "Approximately two minutes." 

He smiles ruefully. "It felt like forever, to me. I kept losing Sha're over and over. She would be in the SGC or on Abydos, alive, then disappear the next minute." His arms wrap around his chest again. "I experienced her death many, many times before you saved me." 

I remember when Cronos killed my father. Master Bra'tac was the one who comforted me and stayed with me through the night. His strength allowed me to face another day. Colonel O'Neill's words come back to me: _That's fine and good, but it won't keep Daniel warm at night._ I wonder if the warrior part of Daniel Jackson would permit a warrior's comfort. "Are you feeling alone right now, Daniel Jackson?" 

He laughs again, but it is not a pleasant laugh. "I was alone when Sha're was missing. Now I'm miserable." 

"Do you wish company tonight?" His puzzled frown does not encourage me. "I, too, have lost someone very close to me and you have been without Sha're for several years. As Colonel O'Neill would say, one side of the bed is cold." 

"You've got to stop talking to Jack," he mutters as he covers his eyes with his hand. 

I ignore his comment as I have heard it before, many times. I have explained that I cannot stop talking to O'Neill, as he is my friend, but I do not understand their laughter at my words. "I only wish to be of assistance, Daniel Jackson. You are welcome to sleep in my bed, if you desire." 

He sits up and stares at me with a most curious expression. "Teal'c, I'm not kicking you out of your own bed," he protests. 

"You will not," I assure him. "I saw how you killed the serpent guard today. A warrior could not have done better. I wish to honor you by allowing you sleeping quarters." 

He continues to stare at me and I wonder if he is experiencing ill effects from the ribbon device. I stand and prepare myself to take him back to the infirmary if I must. 

"I have sleeping quarters, Teal'c." 

He does not sound agreeable to the situation. I do not wish him further pain. "I will not be offended if you refuse." 

He offers one of his smiles that I am familiar with and shakes his head. "I didn't refuse. I just haven't accepted yet." 

His behavior is most puzzling. The Tau'ri have a most difficult language to understand. Either he is agreeable to this, or he is not. It is a simple question. 

He surprises me with a question of his own. "Why do you want to do this?" 

I moderate my voice as Major Carter did earlier with him. "Colonel O'Neill said this was not the homecoming you wished for Sha're and that her death would be of little comfort. I only wished to be of assistance." 

Daniel Jackson's face pinches in sadness and I fear that I have caused him more pain. Perhaps I was mistaken in telling him of O'Neill's comments. 

"Offering your bed to me is your idea of assistance?" he asks as he wipes his eyes once again. 

I begin to explain, "In most cultures, the family comes together in times of grief. SG1 is my family, and I grieve with you, as do Major Carter and Colonel O'Neill. Master Bra'tac was my family when I lost my father. He..." 

"Oh, God..." He falls back on the bed, burying his face in the pillow. His body curls in on itself. 

I am at his side in an instant, worried that he is experiencing effects from the ribbon device. He is trembling beneath my hands. "Should I call Doctor Frasier?" I inquire. I place my hand on his head, trying to ascertain if he has fever. He does not answer, so I roll him over to see his face. It is wet with tears. "Should I contact the infirmary?" I ask again. 

He shakes his head. I believe him incapable of speech. His physical injuries are not what trouble him. He had not accepted the loss of Sha're until this moment. The hope that Daniel Jackson carried inside him is gone and there is nothing to replace it with. He has only begun the grieving process. Much time will pass before he feels better. I vow to be available to him, 'to talk' as he is so fond of saying. 

A few more tears squeeze themselves out from his tightly closed eyelids. "It's not fair." 

This, I understand. "I know it is not." 

That 'lost' look is back on his face and he is shaking again. He whispers, "I'm cold." 

I pull a blanket over his body. "I shall adjust the temperature in the room." 

He shakes his head. "On the inside," he elaborates. "Cold and empty and alone." 

Without hesitation, I remove my boots and slide between him and the wall. I sense his discomfort but do not know the source. 

He laughs nervously. His voice is quiet as he recites, "It's been a long time since I've shared a bed with someone. Before Jack and Kowalsky came back to Abydos, Sha're and I were trying to have a baby. You should have seen her. She was shy with strangers, but had no trouble embarrassing me in front of the whole tribe." His arms wrap around themselves and the shaking begins again. "I miss her, Teal'c. I miss her so much." 

He is crying in earnest now and I put my arm around him, holding him as he grieves for his wife. His chest expands unsteadily under my hand. Time passes slowly, but eventually, he quiets. After a few moments, he speaks. 

"I wonder if it would have been better, letting her live with Apophis. At least she'd be alive and out there somewhere for me to save one day." 

I think carefully on how to answer this. I do not wish to add to his grief, but he must be made to understand. "Sha're already regretted things that Amaunet did while occupying her body. If her life continued, those regrets would be substantial. Would you wish her that pain?" 

"No!" His voice sounds shocked. "No. She'd been through enough. It's just my stubborn thinking. I have to work through every scenario before I can accept something like this. It's hard. Even though we've been separated for over two years, I feel empty." 

"You do not have to accept it immediately," I remind him. "Grieving has no set amount of time to complete." 

He sighs. "I know. I've just been through this so many times, I thought I'd gotten used to it." 

"One does not get used to losing those he cares about, Daniel Jackson." I know he is aware of these facts, but I am familiar enough with him to know he needs to talk. I do not know if it is the sound of another voice or the exchange of words that soothes him. 

"No, I suppose we don't," he agrees, though he sounds unhappy to do so. He is quiet for some time and I think he has fallen asleep. His voice startles me. "Teal'c?"

"Yes, Daniel Jackson," I reply immediately. Whatever he requires, I shall do my best to retrieve it. His request surprises me. 

"Do you think you could start calling me 'Daniel'?" 

I think about it for a moment. It is not something I would normally do. "If it is something you wish." 

"It's more normal-sounding. Most of us don't go around using our full names. And it seems kind of rude, considering we're sharing a bed." 

It sounds as though he is smiling. Is he making a joke? It is so hard to tell with him. "Your name was given to you by your father. It is considered an honor to be addressed by your full name." 

He thinks about that for a minute. "You don't call Sam or Jack by their full names." 

"I call them by their rank, as is fitting their warrior status," I explain. 

"Oh." I am not sure, but I think I have offended him. He does not seem to mind. "Well, I'd still feel better if you just called me 'Daniel'."

"Very well." I pause before adding, "Daniel." It sounds strange and I feel as though I am dishonoring him. But if it is what he wishes, I will abide by it. I can feel his exhaustion through his heavy body. He will be asleep very soon. 

His voice is barely a whisper as he calls my name again. "Teal'c?" 

"Yes, Daniel?"

"Thank you," he murmurs, then I hear no more. 

"You are welcome, Daniel Jackson," I answered softly. The room is darkening around us. Some of the candles have burned out and others are low. I raise my head and blow out the remaining ones at the bed side. 

Even though Sha're is free of the Goa'uld influence, my pledge remains firm. I will see that no harm comes to the people of the Tau'ri or to Daniel Jackson. 

**Author's Note:**

> My earliest draft of these stories is dated July 2000. The last time I looked at them was 2004. Having reread them, I don't see why I didn't think of them as done.


End file.
